si simon na tinatawag na pedro, at si andres na kaniyang kapatid; si santiago na anak ni zebedeo, at ang kaniyang kapatid na si juan; si felipe, at si bartolome; si tomas, at si mateo na maniningil ng buwis; si santiago na anak ni alfeo at si tadeo; si simon na cananeo, at si judas iscariote, na siya ring sa kaniya'y nagkanulo."
judas thaddeus is a betrayal apostle which betrayed and unfollowed god just to keep his promise to satan, because satan says "betrayed jesus and i will be the one to owe your heart".
consider obedience as fun. learn the military way. obey first before you complain. complaining is the easiest way to make life seemingly easy. it is our tool to avoid doing something we don't like.
obedience is not a sign of weakness. in fact, people who know how to obey are the most principled individuals. when you give up your will, you do not become negligent or weak. on the contrary, you become more trusting.
the truth is we become better in so many ways. the bonus is, when it is our time to express our own preferences, others will respond positively.
hope this helps!